NFL Player Spoonerisms

-by DNOMN8R314

The offseason has begun, and even though the league year has not started, we are already on to 2018, a new year and an unstained slate (surprise, it’s a Tide ad). So here’s a little time-waster while we await the combine.

For the uninitiated, a spoonerism is when two letters or sounds are switched in a word or phrase, such as “shake a tower” instead of “take a shower.”

Below are (10?) definitions, each of a two-word phrase that is the spoonerism of the name of an NFL player. See how many you can get! (Example: “Lots of people remove apple centers” would give the definition of “many core,” a spoonerism of “Kenny Moore.”)

Also, pay no attention to the logic – or lack of such – of any of the phrases below. Answers immediately below phrases.

Phrases:

  1. Prohibit during every 24-hour period
  2. Downpour at the old Mets stadium
  3. Maryland congressman Hoyer is a murderer
  4. Castles make babies
  5. British thug runnin’ quickly
  6. Payment for an accidentally-fictitious synonym for “density”
  7. Fruity-red hardwood tree
  8. Poor bridal gift
  9. How Will Smith tells his son to work in the garden
  10. Dead body takin’ its post

Answers:

  1. Dan Bailey (ban daily)
  2. Shane Ray (rain Shea)
  3. Kenny Stills (Steny kills)
  4. Brooks Reed (rooks breed)
  5. Doug Martin (mug dartin’)
  6. Dee Ford (fee dord)
  7. Barry Church (cherry birch)
  8. Dean Lowry (lean dowry)
  9. Joe Haden (hoe Jaden)
  10. Marcus Cannon (carcass mannin’)

That’s all I’ve got. Have fun! (Or rather, since this conclusion comes after the answers, I hope you had fun… oh, forget it.)

—-

The in-season TUMS-O-METER has been put away until September. However, sInce the Combine is still a couple of weeks away, free agency starts mid-March, and the draft isn’t until April, let’s see how well members of Bruh Nation can do for the following predictions:
1. Patriot free agents the team signs/keeps (give names)
2. Patriot free agents the team loses (give names)
3. Free agents from other teams the Patriots sign (give names)
4. How many draft picks the Patriots actually use (number)
5. The player positions the Patriots actually draft
6. How many trades between now and the opening of training camp (number)

Just a thought for some offseason fun. Enjoy and good luck.

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336 Comments on "NFL Player Spoonerisms"

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NewEnglandBlight
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Free agent

Also, hate to say it.. but that was Brady’s last year of greatness. He’s not cut out for another 16 game season..

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Brady will be great when you and I are quivering in fear over post-apocolyptic cannibals, radioactive vegetables, and acid rain. I’m worried about many eventualities in my advancing years: declining middle-class, global warming, mutually-assured destruction, failing liver…but Tom Brady not being able to accurately read a defense and throw a football is not one of them.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

possiby the best response to my prognostication of doom.. touche good sir

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

possibly*

Mattsky
Member
Free agent

Blasphemy!

Neil X
Member
Free agent

Man, it’s kind of hard to take that it’s likely that there will be no Patriots news of significance until the opening of free agency. They’re not going to tag anybody. The most significant thing coming might be some restructures to cap space and some anticipated cuts of salary (Harris, McClellin, Branch, Allen, Cyrus Jones).

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

Good, that will let the wound heal up.. hearing more about the Pats right now just rips the bandaid off too early.

cqrun
Member
Free agent

Goodell will think of something.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Really strange musical choices in figure skating.

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

they sucked you in

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Nah, not really. I’d rather be doing mock drafts!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

USA Men’s hockey sport tomorrow morning.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Great! Let’s all quit our jobs and watch it.

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

Cali is rich he will float us a loan

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Don’t think so.

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

man you are heartless. u feed a dog steak but you wont help out another human being?

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

so Loyko knows Olympics too?

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

His knowledge is endless

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Especially in hindsight.

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

As long as mom sends a ham sandwich down to the basement.

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

meatloaf

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

I watched the women’s hockey game between Japan and Switzerland.. man, was that some bad hockey.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Like women’s soccer was not long ago, women’s hockey is still trying to expand the number of competitive teams.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Are you guys for real with this Olympics? Should I really be watching? On a scale of 0 to Baseball, how boring is it???? (J.k. Jon)

Neil X
Member
Free agent

Well the mens and womens half pipe was wicked entertaining. I like the Olympics. I like watching a sport once every 4 years and never once in between. I even like curling.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Same here. Most of the events are interesting. Curling has a hint of chess on ice.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

I haven’t seen chess on ice in the olympics yet.. but hey, anything is possible.

Neil X
Member
Free agent

Curling has the identical rules as the Norwegian variant of bocce. They even call the last throw the hammer.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Ok…can we make a drinking game out of it? I’m in!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Dilly dilly

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

every time an announcer says an elongated “wow”.. you have to drink.. drink twice if the wow is unwarranted.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

So, twice every time?

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

every time.. all the time.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Just witnessed an awesome half-pipe competition,

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

im watching jeopardy. i havent tuned into the olympics

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Are you one of those people that knows every single answer? My cousin is like that. He’s either a genius or he has access to some pre-taped European feed.

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

no not at all

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

You get a stuffed tiger and you get a stuffed tiger and you get a stuff tiger

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

Is that what it is? I thought it’s some weird hybrid yeti-hog.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

Wait.. they don’t get medals.. they just get little zebra pigs!?!?

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Medal ceremony is later.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

And now for figure skating.. whyyyyyyyyyyYYYYYYyyyYYyYYy

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

LOL

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

It’s like having grandma walk in right after reaching third base for the first time.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Neil X
Member
Free agent

I like figure skating. It’s always good for a few violent faceplants. Isn’t that the main reason to watch the Olympics?

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

yeah.. kinda the same with watching tight rope walking.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

I guess NASCAR season can start soon enough for you.

Neil X
Member
Free agent

Nah, you don’t get to SEE the drivers faceplant. When an ice skater goes down, they take up the full screen

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent
NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

That was the best half pipe competition I’ve ever seen.. what a contest!

PatriotPrideBoy
Member
Free agent

Half pipe sounds like a euphemism for a mediocre date

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

poor girl

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Sounds like a bad day for a crackhead.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Walk off gold

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

The kid from Japan was unreal.. between the qualifying’s yesterday and the finals today, it was probably the best olympic sports even I’ve watched besides hockey.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

WOOHOOO!!! CRAZY HALF PIPE

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

BOOM!!! GOLD!!!!!!

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

SEAN WHITE WOOOO

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Now we wait…….

bring
Member
Free agent

I will wait 30 secs before my next updated score

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Appreciate it brother! Nice empty netter from the Cap’n.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

I do what I can for the cause.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Empty netter for the Cap’n….no fish for the crew tonight?

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Lol.

Mattsky
Member
Free agent

Dave Brown
‏@ThatDaveBrown

2018 #Patriots mock draft:

Round 1 (31): Some guy from Alabama.
R2 (41): Total bust CB.
R2 (63): Traded to Bears for four future 1st round picks.
R3 (95): QB from a dopey school/future NFL MVP.
R6 (191): Toss up between Urban Meyer’s nephew and Nick Saban’s godson.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Lol

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Needs more LAX players. And torn ACLs.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Hey, a mock draft that mocks itself.

NewEnglandBlight
Member
Free agent

this is the best mockdraft i’ve heard yet

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Welp. Shaun White now in second. Has one more run to go.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Hope he’s got something in his back pocket. Would like to see him go out on top.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Gonna need it.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

It’s hard for me to get wrapped up in judged competitions. I appreciate what they do but how can you really say one run is better than another (unless it’s far and away better or somebody wipes out.) Dealing with the subjectivity of NFL officiating is difficult enough.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

If they had any style they would have spraypainted “F*** BRADY” on the Liberty Bell. Vandalism is a lost art.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Gonna be that way until they start cutting people, the combine, etc.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

I know I shouldn’t care but can somebody who does twitter tweet to that Philly douche. —>

Tom Brady has won more Super Bowl MVPs in 18 years than Philly has won Super Bowls in 84 years.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Oh let him have his fun. They won. Live and let live. At least until the revolution. Then they hang like dogs.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

“Fuck Brady”? I’m sorry but that doesn’t fly with me. I remember being in the streets of Kenmore Square when the Pats won their first ever Super Bowl and nobody was spray painting “Fuck Kurt Warner”…In fact, we just wanted to celebrate our beloved team, that chose to run out in unison, rather than be introduced as individuals. Philly just doesn’t know what they’re doing.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Matt…Boston is the town that made “F*** Jeter” a thing. Let Philly have their moment.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

But “Yankees Suck!” Shouldn’t we let them know? Asking for a friend.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

LOL

Mattsky
Member
Free agent

I was shocked when I started college in MA in 1981 at all the hate towards the Yankees. Bumper stickers, T-shirts and stuff like that. I never saw anything like that in NY about Boston.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Honestly, I don’t get it either. Baseball is boring. Who really cares?

Jonc77
Member
Free agent

yeah but soccer is exciting.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

The majority of the world’s population agrees!!

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Boston had a serious little brother complex back then. Why would NY have that stuff? They were New York!

rking88
Member
Free agent

“acting like you’ve been there before” is a lost art

bring
Member
Free agent

4-2 Bs

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Spoiler alert! I guess my stream is :30 behind.

bring
Member
Free agent

It’s on NESN

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

I don’t have cable, Too expensive.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

DINGOAAAAAAAL

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

To hump every leg in Australia?

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

And eat every baby, yes

Panic Time
Member
Free agent

Ok guys, no easy to chat on this $2 phone. Stay safe and make sure BB doesn’t draft asafety in the second round

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Smoke signals or GTFO

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Featured!!

cqrun
Member
Free agent

But then he can’t send clear signals.

bring
Member
Free agent

3-2 Bs

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Dingoal

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Dingo 2.0

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Dingo II: Electric Boogaloo

Panic Time
Member
Free agent

I’m in before Doom struck

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

??????

Panic Time
Member
Free agent

Isn’t the bblog scheduled to die

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Not really. It’s a matter of whether Zoo’s new set up is used, or if Frank has something new, or if they both work on something together. We’ll have something.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Two sites! What are we, hippies? They shall fight to the death for our amusement and only the winner will know glory mwuhahahahahaaha!!!!!!

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Agreed.

rking88
Member
Free agent

anybody here?

Panic Time
Member
Free agent

Dead bodies

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

What am I….chopped liver?

Panic Time
Member
Free agent

Don’t pretend to be bacon now

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

no

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Broons tied at 2 after 2.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Where the heck is Dingo with our score by score updates? Slacker!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Shaun White is no nonsense tonight.

Pauly
Guest
Free agent

Gettin’ older will do that to you.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Real vs. PSG tomorrow? Should be fun!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

What about Fake vs. MSG?

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

LOL, depends…is that Madison Square Garden or monosodium glutamate? Either way, I’m picking Fake!!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Hi

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Aloha.

DinoScapelli
Editor
Free agent

OK, I can take a hint. I’m out.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Don’t go!

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Zoo said we won’t be fired in the new set-up. But he and Frank need to get in contact.

DinoScapelli
Editor
Free agent

The Pats need a player like Reuben Foster!
But not a person like Reuben Foster.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Corned beef, swiss cheese, and sauerkraut on rye promoted to grow or develop….oh wait, I was supposed to jumble those letters first? That’s too hard.

cqrun
Member
Free agent

How can thou forget sand island….

Deadsmack #NotDone
Member
Free agent

NFL Full First Round Mock Draft with Updated Draft Order | NFL
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnAgkJtFK6k

#31 pick – Pats pick Harrison Philips, DT, Stanford

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Hope he’s not another Richards- smart but can’t play.

Deadsmack #NotDone
Member
Free agent

People also said Fleming was smart but couldn’t play

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

I don’t think the book has been written yet on Jordan Richards. I know he’s sucked and it’s easy to kick him when he’s down but you know who seems to believe in him? Bill Belichick. Remember, he just completed his 3rd year (2nd was completely wiped out with an injury.) Edelman was playing defensive back his 3rd year in the NFL. I’m not saying he’s going to be a great player but just that he seems to have the work ethic and intelligence where I wouldn’t write him off just yet.

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

He stinks.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

People used to say the same about you but look at you now!

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

“Who’s been wrong more than Charley Casserly since he left the Redskins?” -Bill Belichick

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Time for dinner.

dp73
Member
Free agent

It traditional here to tell us what you are having for dinner 🙂

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

He’ll be having a bowl of Captain Crunch 🙂

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

My apologies ….. Chinese

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Not sure i’d like the Bruins to go after Nash. —>>>

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Justin Houston being cut by KC—–>

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Sounds like teams have started the cutting machine.

dp73
Member
Free agent
Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Thought I saw that he was going to be cut- somewhere over there——–>

dp73
Member
Free agent

Where?

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Hurry up!! Mardi Gras is winding down!!!!

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Who cares.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Man….. aren’t you the Debbie Downer.

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Long day.

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

LAISSER LES BON TEMPS ROULER!!!!!!

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

où est la rue bourbon???????

MasterAndCommander
Editor
Free agent

Ah…… non…

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

Are David Harris and Armond Armstead the same person?

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Derrick Johnson is set to become a FA———————->

TS13
Member
Free agent

At 35, hmmm, he could wheel around.

Jdog Lemon Head
Member
Free agent

Is that how he rolls?

zoocore
Member
Free agent

Jdog always keeping it wheel, with the puns

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Harrison is 39.

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Just busy 🙁

TS13
Member
Free agent

All out buying Valentine’s Day gifts!

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

I’m saving draft thoughts for articles!

zoocore
Member
Free agent

Still messing with it. I think it’s just a slow day. We need more controversial patriots stories.

MrLucky
Member
Free agent

The year long Super Bowl drought has been unbearable for us all.

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

Pretty good meme I saw
comment image

Calipatsfan3473
Member
Free agent

Never is.

dp73
Member
Free agent

I posted this the other day.( In no particular order)

Luke Falk, Washington State- QB
Sony Michel, Georgia-RB
Hayden Hurst- South Carolina -TE ( not crazy about is age-24)
Mike McGlinchey, Notre Dame -OT
Connor Williams, Texas-OT
Sam Hubbard, Ohio State -DE
Maurice Hurst, Michigan-DT
Harold Landry, Boston College-OLB
Uchenna Nwosu, USC -OLB
Mike Hughes, UCF-CB
Josh Jackson, Iowa -CB
Lorenzo Carter, Georgia—OLB

Today I was this.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/nfl/2018-nfl-mock-draft-feb-12-2018-edition/ss-BBJ2Q6v?li=BBnb7Kz

dp73
Member
Free agent

This are just the players I have seen play that the Patriots may have a chance to get.

Saturn III
Member
Free agent

I like Sony, especially the TV’s!

dp73
Member
Free agent

?

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

who’s ready for some NEPFF draft coverage!

SamiG
Member
Free agent

eh

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

I see you’ve worked them in to a frenzy.

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

First! Pick! First! Pick! First! Pick! First! Pick!

Jdog Lemon Head
Member
Free agent

I don’t know why I continue to read comments regarding the SB. Read the article regarding the illegal formation and couple idiots said:
1) Pats used illegal plays in the past that weren’t called
2) Pats benefited from calls all game long
3) Pats dynasty is over. Eagles dominated the Pats and if they played again, Eagles would win by a larger margin

So much wrong will these statements…

dfwpatsfan
Member
Free agent

Unnecessarily stoking controversy with those articles. It seems the only way to engage fans now is to have them squabble over game calls.

PatriotPrideBoy
Member
Free agent

Gang gang

Jdog Lemon Head
Member
Free agent

I’m not hip…what does this actually mean?

hugowasmyhomeboy
Member
Free agent

It’s a greeting. I had to google it initially.

Jdog Lemon Head
Member
Free agent

What’s the origin? I googled it but then it pointed me to urban dictionary…nothing good comes from urban dictionary.

Neil X
Member
Free agent

I don’t know about that. “Motorboating” is listed there.

zoocore
Member
Free agent

Am I the only one that read that as “gang bang”, at first?

Yeah? Okay, carry on.

LaFeteMattDog
Member
Free agent

Well Valentine’s day is coming up. Something special in store for the missus?